Hi WTBH,
My STBXAH used those phrases to manipulate me, so I share your concern about how your friend may perceive himself (and you). I agree with you in never wanting to go back to a situation in which I'm told my feelings are inaccurate, or my responses to various comments amounted to wordsmithing, etc. I think those are ways of judging and subtly putting down the other person's views, feelings, and values. I'm only beginning to understand how and why my STBXAH had the impression that I didn't like to talk about feelings. I didn't feel safe or respected, because he was so critical or downplaying of what I tried to say.
Just my two cents based on my experience, which may or may not be similar. The phrases sure do sound the same, however.