Originally Posted by SandyO

Tonight has been the first night I REALLY wanted to drink. I've had a very emotional day. I have fertility issues. It's physical but of course alcohol doesn't help. I'm truly embarrassed to admit this. Totally insane - an alcoholic trying to have a baby. It's such an emotional ride of optimism and pessimism. Also, really missing my mum back home in Australia.
I didn't drink, but hate that I wanted to. I didn't have the energy to pick myself up out of the funk and allowed the negative thoughts to keep swirling around in my head. I just sat in front of YouTube all night watching old sitcoms smoking like a chimney (yes, not helpful). FYI episodes of "Absolutely Fabulous" are NOT a good way to try and distract yourself from alcohol - but still hilarious!
Sorry for over sharing, but it helps to explain my emotional state. Will wake up tomorrow to 4 weeks sober.
Have a nice day/night everyone. Now I need to think of five things to be grateful for today!!