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Old 02-14-2016, 06:17 AM
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ICanDoBetter
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Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Northeast US
Posts: 773
Talked to my husband

We were driving somewhere and I sometimes get motion issues. I commented that I had a headache and he jokingly said, " drink too much?" I simply said, " yeah, too much iced tea."

A few minutes later I asked if he had noticed that I didn't drink last night. He simply said yes. I asked if that surprised him and I honk he said yes ... Then asked if I'm trying to "turn over a new leaf". I told him that I am and he said, "that's good - I was starting to think we were going to need to have an intervention."

My first internal reaction was to be miffed. His means of being supportive isn't what I need. Typically when I've finally worked up the nerve to verbalized that I recognize the need to change, his response is to remind me if I reach for a drink what I said, and then he cracks a joke or simply gives up. I get that that's who he is and his family's way... But I also get that it isn't what I need

So instead of getting upset, I took a deep breath and explained to him how the support he gives isn't helpful to me. I explained that I'm trying, that I have a recovered friend whom I'm talking wig and also about his forum. He inquired a little about what I meant about his support but he wasn't upset.

It was a good dialogue and hopefully will result in more.
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