Originally Posted by
Odelle 
I have read so many post on drinking dreams, and I have to admit, I have never had one. How strange is that?
Thump, I am going out on a limb here, but this is what I suggest. Go to Hallmark and get the gal a card, not a mushy Valentine, but one that expresses your feelings on regrets and lets her know that she is on your mind. No text or ecard, send the card through the mail and send a simple spring floral arrangement. Personally, I think it would do you both good!
I've ordered the flowers.
I sent her a long letter a couple of weeks ago regarding the wrongs I've done here, and my remorse and regrets. We're in contact enough that she knows how I feel.
She's in Alanon, and is clearly building and maintaining boundaries in our relationship. I understand that, and have no one to blame but myself for it. That doesn't keep it from hurting. She won't tell me that she wants to be with me once my sobriety has taken stronger root. I understand her skepticism, and have told her as much -- but that doesn't keep it from hurting.
Part of me thinks I need to walk away, and part of me doesn't want to leave her for the world. While we're on good terms and do still say "I love you", it's hard for me to escape the feeling that she doesn't mean it like I do. And that hurts.
Sorry to clutter the thread with my whining this morning. I have made my own bed, and it's time to sleep in it.