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Old 02-06-2016, 10:15 PM   #1 (permalink)

Join Date: Feb 2016
Posts: 2

Needing Advice

Hi all,

I am so happy to have found this forum and am hoping that with your experience, you can give me some advice on the situation I am currently in.

I was dating my boyfriend for 7 years, with the last 2 years plagued with issues from his alcohol dependency. He was drinking in private and sneaking around. When his family and I found out, he went to outpatient rehab, then seemed to do better, then eventually relapsed, then seemed to do better, then relapse again...the pattern continued.

Though there were obviously things I could have done differently, I stood by him and really tried to help him work past his issues (he started drinking after his parents got divorced and he hated his job). About a year ago I was offered a job out of state. After a lot of discussion between the 2 of us, we decided it was a good idea if I took the job, and he would follow. Things didn't really work out the way we planned and we continued a long distance relationship. One night he called me drunk, thinking he was in another state, and ended up going to the hospital. Afterwards he said he needed a break. Just a few weeks ago I saw him and he told me that couldn't be with me and needed to be alone to work on his issues.

I am having a severely hard time with this break up. I regret moving and am continuously analyzing every single thing I did. I love him so much, want to help him work through his problem, and spend the rest of our lives together. However, he is firm on his stance and doesn't even want to talk. From what I hear he seems content, but I'm worried about him getting the help he needs (his parents sometimes brush it under the rug) and getting healthy.

Has anyone has experience with a situation like this? Is it best for him to try and work through everything on his own? How can I move past this relationship if I am truly making things worse?

I'm so lost so any insight would be so helpful.

Thank you so much!!
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