I thought you were going to AA?
If it's a transport problem maybe you can get a lift with someone?
Have you considered online AA meetings maybe?
I think, if you've given up alcohol, and you're obsessing about any aspect of that that, then there's obviously some kind of problem, PP.
The label you want to put on it is up to you - so long as you agree there's a need for action.
Things can do and will get better
D