I'm sorry Penguin.
I lost my GP too when I was drinking.
I really regret now I did not give her the best life I could, and I really regret getting drunk when she died. She deserved a better send off, y'know?
StrongBird - I think you'll come to embrace reality like I did - it's pretty cool to be 'present' all the time.
I try to stay balanced tho - I need some down time too - and after a while it's easy to find positive healthy ways to goof off a little
D