Kiki this is my personal take but if I were in your shoes I would embrace the therapy now, full on, and worry about the drink a bit later. It sounds as if you have so much to work on and I worry that if you do not first heal all that inner pain that you have been carrying around with you for so long that you will never have a fair chance at getting sober. Sounds like a case of needing to smash all the eggs open before you get to make that great ommelete.
When I had too much stuff going on in my life.. sorting my meds out for bipolar, self harming, and binge eating and drinking, my Therapist wanted me to really work on "me" and my underlying problems before tackling all the indesirable "behaviours".
I followed his lead and so far it is pretty much working. In fact the more that I came to terms with and dealt with my past failures, and traumas the more the undesirable behaviours disappeared on their own.
Am thinking of you. x