It's okay if no one responds to this. I have got to get things out there. I know about gratitude lists. I do them. I am having one hell of a day and haven't felt so depressed in a while. So I'm going to vent and share my "problem" thoughts without giving many damns. Things on my mind: -my dad who I found out is walking my stepsister down the aisle when she gets married in May. He wasn't there for me or my brother for many years. I have been so angry at him. He's really up there on my resentment list for Step 4. -speaking of step 4 I am taking for freaking EVER on it. I can't balance my life. My job. My husband. I get that sobriety comes first before anything. But my sponsor is reminding me of the importance of step 4 and I feel like I can't keep up. -I constantly crave chocolate -I can't stick to a damn schedule/to do list and no planner works for me effectively because I am so scatterbrained -I know I'm not the only person in the world with problems but my GOD I feel like **** lately and that I'm insignificant in many areas. -Yeah yeah yeah I'm sober woooo but I constantly (overthink?) think back on foods I've had that have alcohol in them and wonder if I should have picked up a white chip. Or paranoid that because I have dreams of being drunk that I have actually drank. My mind isn't where it should be today and lately and I have no clue why. I'm on my medication as usual too. Just talking. Might as well play words with friends and head to sleep.