Hey everyone.
Checking in. Just had a count. 60 days sober today. Feeling good. This is by far the longest period I have not had a drink since my last pregnancy 12 years ago.
Talking of which. I have been wondering about something. I have been a heavy drinker since my 20s, drinking most days of the week and then occasional bad binges . The quantity that I drank increased with the passing of years and I could not moderate. Yet during my 2 pregnancies in my 30s I stopped drinking for 9 months each time never ever cheating once. I don't remember suffering at the time either. Anyone else experience this? Is it simply because as soon as another life dépends on you your brain finally says stop? Because as soon as the pregnancies were over I started drinking again immediately.
I was just reading Dee's great post about finding enjoyment in things when you are no longer buzzed. After only 2 months I can already relate to that. Until now I have thought there is no point doing anything if I can't drink. But I am starting to find pleasure in the simple things in life.. walking the dog because I enjoy it.. walking further than usual because I want to not because I feel a duty to... enjoying interesting documentaries that require some intellectual concentration rather than mind numbing soap operas, I have joined a volunteering group at the local childrens hospital... I can't believe how much I enjoy it and I feel a new kind of "high" when I come home from a shift. So many things. And the most important is this :
My son, age 11 said yesterday, out of the blue "You now you 're a great Mummy". He has never really said anything like that to me before. My eyes filled with tears as I hugged him. I am sure it is because he has noticed how much more present I am for him both emotionally and with my presence. What an amazing BUZZ that gave me. One that I would never have experienced whilst drunk.
I want to continue on this sober path more than anything. Hope you are all slowly winning your own battles.