Ok guys...now I'm in a funk. Not drinking...just feel depressed. I just posted this in the NewComers section hoping for some advice but if you guys have any, that would be great.
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I am only 50 days sober & am finding myself strongly disliking my husband. He's not a bad guy...he's actually a good guy. We have been married for 18 years. I just feel like alcohol was hurting our marriage & now I feel like sobriety is hurting our marriage too! Ugh!
I was trying to plan a family vacation today to the beach for the spring & I just started crying and realized I just don't want to go! I thought about "why" I don't want to go & it's because I don't want to spend all that time with my husband.
He's a "normal" drinker and I know if we go he will want to drink "normally". I can't drink AT ALL because I'm an alcoholic. It makes me feel inadequate. If he drinks it will really bother me b/c he gets buzzed really easy & it triggers me. If he doesn't drink (which he won't if I ask him not to), he will pout the whole time. It's a lose-lose situation.
For a long time the only fun we ever had together was when we were drinking...at least that's what it seemed like to me. Now I don't drink and he wishes I could drink "normally" with him and I feel like we just aren't on the same page anymore & have nothing in common.
I've been really depressed about this all day. Does any of this make sense? Any experience with this? I feel really sad....
Thank you