Hey Undies,
For those of you on the edge of your seats about my dilemma from yesterday...no golf. I chose a family visit that included lasagna that was decadent and was gifted one of my aunts almost famous nut rolls. Good decision. If only the Steelers had won the game that we watched together.
I shut off my tv last week in moving prep and I am forced with another dilemma for today. While I am not pinned to football on the boob tube, I do watch and/or attend about 75% of the Pgh Steeler and my alma matter/Pitt games. Pitt is in a bowl game at 2:30 this afternoon vs Navy on ESPN. Do I go to the bar next to my body-pump class that starts at 5:30, or not?
Fact is, I hate bars and would not even consider this option were it not for class. Since many close friends are college peeps, it would be easy to weasel an in-home invite...but that would mean I would miss class. I am down to but a handful of classes to attend prior to leaving and blowing it off would throw a major wrench into a recovery first based lifestyle....mind, BODY and spirit. Anyway, I'm sure the answer will come to me soon.
Key, I read your post and I couldn't help think of "The Promises". I know that they are AA based, but, I believe that they "could" be expanded to include any recovery based program.
These promises were offered to me at no charge, provided I was willing to work the steps. I can honestly say that I have been granted little bits of all of them over the past almost 31 months. They are:
If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are half way through. We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness. We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it. We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know peace. No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others. That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear. We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows. Self-seeking will slip away. Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change. Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us. We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us. We will suddenly realize that a Higher Power is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.
None of this happened overnight, but, my recovery first attitude has led to a pretty amazing happiness - in spite of some major wreckage that in many ways align with the issues you described.
If I were facing a difficult day, as I still often do, I would be sure to write a gratitude list, accept that I can only tackle what I can TODAY, be sure to include music as part of my day, avoid isolation through interaction and try to help another suffering from our disease.
Somehow, keeping a focus in just for today seems to work magic for me.
Let's enjoy another sober day, all!
Carlos