Self-pity and loneliness, huge triggers.
176 days, but feeling like I’m stuck on day 1 this holiday.
I remember my first days of sobriety, not even being able to handle one day at a time. I would lie in bed, counting my breaths to 150, knowing that meant 10 minutes had passed. Then doing that again and again.
The last weeks before Christmas were great, I’ve always enjoyed advent. But bring on the holiday, and I get really down. Last night was particularly bad, and I had this extreme urge to just get away (meaning drink). I’m getting my 6 month chip next week, and I’m not about to throw that away for an evening of even further depressing behaviour though. This too shall pass, right? I've read on here that the 6 month mark can be rough.
Just getting through my Monday, then there’s a meeting tomorrow. I’m dreading another 4 day weekend, but in a week life goes back to normal, thankfully. Right now I just feel like the loneliest person on the planet.