Turning into my alcoholic mom or .....
I grew up with a functioning alcoholic mom who never went into treatment, relapsed too many times to count, and no one outside of house knew about her addiction. My dad would threaten to leave, she'd stop, then restart...I always knew my dad would never leave and he never did. I lived my entire young adult life and even now literally asking myself every time I drank, "is this the drink that will turn me into my mom".
Move forward to 2.5 years ago and I learn my depressed, anxious, paranoid husband is addicted to pain pills. We have been up and down and I finally have a date that I will serve him for a divorce and I have just realized something profound. All these years I worked to not become my mom, and I actually have become my dad. The codependent, enabling, and emotionally abused spouse! I thought I was strong and knew about addiction. I knew virtually nothing until I came to this site and appreciate the knowledge immensely.
Thank You All!!