Originally Posted by
patricia68 
Good morning. My husband and I had another argument yesterday, we even discussed divorce this time. I don't even know what to think anymore...I feel like I'm witnessing a car crash in slow motion...
Trying to find something positive in all this madness...I am sober, I can think clearly...and even though I still have anxiety, it's not the paralyzing panic I used to feel while I was drinking.
My whole world is falling apart but at least my body is healing and I'm stronger.
Maybe all these years of drinking destroyed my marriage, maybe it was already broken and I didn't see it because I was drinking...I don't know. I'll try to leave the past behind today and focus on healing and being sober right here right now...
Aw, sos sorry to hear it's not going so well with husband... I am.in stasis here... not sure if that's good or bad.... but it's not changing! I wonder too of the drinking was to cover the wrinkles of the relationship.. and to not alow myself to analyse it..... until it went boom because of what I did. The wrinkles were becoming chasms before I had my drunken moment , but I could only admit that deep in my head and I the smallest hours. Now I'm trying to think logically about it.
I am trying to mentally compile a list; What I like about my husband. Now.... not 20 years ago... what I like about him now. Am hoping that will gain me some clarity on why I am still here. I want to want to be here, not just be obliged. I know what I want him to do and say, but I don't think he will!!!!
Just keep on being sober and keep thinking! Lots of good happy vibes xxx