Evening, All. Thank you for the support! I am feeling a bit better. I forced myself to go to the gym after work because I was feeling really down. Of course working out made me feel better
I am thinking a lot about what the doctor said. She asked me why I haven't told anyone about my relapse the last four months. That made me think. I didn't tell my parents because we really never talked about me quitting (other than when I sent a text saying I was) and I didn't want to worry them. Especially my mom. And I never told friends because I didn't really want to come to terms with my relapse; I just wanted to pretend everything is okay. I think that's the issue - I need to DEAL with what happened and what will happen if I ever drink again.
I am not thrilled about being put on more meds, but I have another appointment in three weeks to see how I am responding to them. And my doctor strongly recommended seeing a psychiatrist next month which is a good idea (especially bc of the meds).
I just need to focus on the light at the end of the tunnel, which is long-term sobriety. That's what I want.