Patricia, hang in there! I don't want to beat a dead horse, but you know that it will take time. You've been sober a few weeks which is awesome, but a few weeks compared to the years you spent drinking is just the start. Things will ONLY get worse if you drink; give yourself the chance of happiness again by staying sober. (((Patricia)))
Kiki, thank you for bringing up the holiday topic. I'm the same as you: my drinking was mostly done alone bc I couldn't drink the way I wanted to in front of others. But past Christmases I've always managed to be very drunk just bc I had time off work, etc. your reasons for going to AA are great. I've never been to a meeting but I think it's time I try a few out. I know I need to do something different this time and that in person support will help.
To everyone else, I hope you are well. Take care!