Well done Sarge. You should be proud of yourself.
Recovery is about finding your true self. By that I mean finding things that bring you happiness and satisfaction in life. I understand that addiction and depression can hinder ones growth in life. When I was addicted to pain meds every morning I wake up so depressed and with such guilt. Everyday the same damn routine. Get up feel horrible about my life. And its not were life has taken me, Its were I have taken me in life. But temporally I would feed my body with drugs and escape running away from me one more day.
Reservations of letting go of the only way I know how to survive and cope with life is so freighting and depressing. Freighting because if I didn't take my drugs I will be sick from withdrawals. Depressing because of my addiction life s*ck. What a vicious cycle to live life like that.
Thank you for sharing your story, it gives me a lot to be grateful for.
Hugs and prayers
TB