Hello everyone,
Snoozy, darling, I'm so sorry to hear of the dreadful turmoil you've been going through. Please stay close. We all love you and want the best for you. You are a wonderful person, but when you (we) drink, you become someone else, and that villain takes over.
This is from my sobriety journal, it came from someone on SR, I'm sorry, I didn't write the name so I can't credit the person. It strikes a chord with me and I hope will with you too.
"In so many areas of our lives, we are usually only willing to go so far. Beyond that, we tend to float, in effect settling for where we are, because we don't have the vision, or the will, or the know how to do any better."
In my case, I know I get stuck on the lack of vision part. Fear keeps us stuck.
Please don't settle for where you are. Reach out to Shaun, I'm sure he's worried sick. Angry, yes, maybe, but worried, as are all your family. I hope you can get home soon and begin a new plan. Courage!