enfinthechange

They have all gone out to the cinema. ... my husband doesn't want to talk to me, the marriage is over I guess. I am crying and sobbing and googling ways to kill myself... the magnitude of my stupidity is settling in, the harm and the damage and the fool I have made of myself. I think I am probably depressed anyway, certainly have some kind of mental problems, my husband hasn't met my needs really for ages, so pissed brain did something about it. With a guy up the road in the village...I just can't get over my stupidity.....

I can be sober, so far, but can I ever get over this.... I can't see how.

I can also see all the good my husband does, all the nice kind things... and now I have hurt him so bad....he has to deal with me ffs, that's bad enough job. Nown wonder he's grumpy and finds it hard to love me.... I'm a ****** nightmare.