THippy

Remember my baby giraffe analogy? Still very relevant.
Example:
I handle all of the finances here. That's an area of control that I hope to maintain even when/if things spiral downward as I let go of other ropes. For the sake of my and my children's security.
AH is going on a business trip next week so he mentioned that he'll need some cash for the trip.
My first instinct is to say (and I did say. Oops.) "work is paying for all of your expenses"
His reply was "Not ALL of them."
I say, "they pay for your transportation, hotel and food. What else is there?"
He begins to get annoyed. "So you don't think I should have ANY money to spend?"
I tell him that I'll see what is available after I pay the bills today.
End of discussion.

I KNOW that this cash he needs is for his drinks that the company won't pay for.
To me, logically, I don't think he should have any more cash than he otherwise spends on booze when he's not traveling.

So am I being logical? Or Am I controlling? By budgeting extra cash, am I enabling?

Again, I have the legs and general idea of how they're supposed to work, but I haven't yet achieved an upright position.

All the sudden, every little thing I do or don't do is subject to my own intense scrutiny as to whether I'm contributing to the problem.