Emme, I'm thinking about you and hoping your mom proves them all wrong, and most of all hoping you have the support and the downtime , that's just so hard.
So many posts about relapse , and we're all about an inch away from that, esp for me later in the day when backwards 'logic' and urges set in.
Do you ever use fear? For example the memory or the photo of someone you care about who went much deeper into this hell? Or a paragraph describing your own worst experience ? Make yourself read or look at it before buying, because it's taped to the ID you use? Just something to offset all the the glamorous ads about drinking , and the BS from your AV that your subconscious is bombarded with every minute? That's my idea that I want to try , since I come very close to making an error when I'm , as they say, hungry angry and tired etc.