So I went shopping to a big city a couple of hours away yesterday. This trip has all the makings of a crave-minefield. There is a train journey, lots of cool bars with people enjoying wine alfresco, lunch in a nice Italian restaurant and the big wine section I'm the department store, with free samples and advice, right next to the cheese section.
At lunch in the Italian restaurant I did look around and to my surprise no one was drinking and I was never a lunchtime drinker anyway. One down.
At the departments store I always feel money burning a hole in my pocket. It's a high end department store and the service is outstanding. I bought a pair of trousers, less said about the price the better, and headed to the cheese section. I can't get cheese where I live so I go crazy here (I'm eating some as I type). People are walking around offering samples of wine but I refuse. I still want to preserve in sobriety.
The train journey home is long and most people have bought food to eat. Normally I would have a half bottle of wine and some beer. Then immediately buy more when I reached my destination. Sitting on the train waiting to depart I get a phone call from my wife asking if I'm drinking. It suddenly dawned on me that despite not drinking for now over 9 weeks I haven't told anyone. Even my wife doesn't really know about the effect alcohol has on me, the places it takes me. I think if you asked her when I last drank she would say something like 3 weeks ago. I'm high functioning and alcohol hasn't caused me any family/work problems at all so me drinking or not doesn't really impact on my wife and family. Oh I also noticed that on the train no one else was drinking. I always thought everyone drank on the train.
Not I'm back from the gym ready for another week of fighting this. I can feel the craving getting a bit more intense.