Originally Posted by
jackrussell 
Still around and, more or less, kicking, AA: that's me.
Want to talk about your journey? I remember that last winter, you said you were doing a bicycle messenger service in the snow? Maybe I've got some details wrong. I thought that showed determination, risk-taking, and a great ability to ignore snow and ice conditions while doing work on a bike. Qualities that I do not possess. Good to see you checking in.
Yah I picked up a side gig to pay off some bills. It was actually pretty nice, you get to pop in earbuds and listen to an audiobook and really only interact with people when you deliver the stuff. Perfect if you're not in to sitting still and aren't huge on social interactions, hah. And holy ****, if you want some leg muscles, that'll do it.
My journey? Made it 1 1/2 years without the booze. Had quit pot a few months after alcohol. Never really got in to AA much but would occassionally attend a meeting. At some point it actually almost felt easy being sober in a way.... Life wasn't easy, but I kind of felt like the not-drinking aspect was alright.
But I found it difficult to talk about with dates. A few people were turned off by it when I told them. The last person I dated before I fell off the wagon, I never told. At some point after a few dates they suggested we get drunk together. And I was so dumb, lying to myself, "Yah... I've made it 1.5 years without a drink. I think i've got this thing covered." So I did. And then I would only drink out on dates. And then I found myself drinking every time we went out together. And then I found myself drinking at a local bar where I made friends. And then I found myself at the bar every night, and every night I wasn't there I was at home drinking and chainsmoking cigarettes--which I had quit over 5 years ago.
So eventually I was right back where I quit last time, only I was in a new neighborhood that had more bars (my local spot was 1.5 blocks from my apartment).
Think I just missed being "normal" and thought I could do it. But I'm not normal, I'm a ******* alcoholic.
Went to an AA meeting yesterday, felt good about it... Until I went to buy some groceries. Never made it. Saw the Cubs game was on in a bar I passed, used that as an excuse to stop in for a drink. Drank for th next 8 hours essentially. Hung over as hell, body feels really funky, shaky. Not sure what side of the symptoms I'm on, coming or going. Goooooood times.
