JR, I can relate about the mindfulness thing. Sometimes it's not deliberate. Sometimes I have to consciously bring it back, but I have to remember to bring it back. At work I have a tendency to go on autopilot when I'm feeling lulled and dulled by tedium, and then I catch myself. It's that autopilot that has contributed to a number of injuries. I was more accident prone when I was drinking because I was less often mindful between binges (not to mention while binging). But, ironically, my accidents tended to happen between binges. It was like, if I'm doing something potentially dangerous while drunk, I would be a little extra careful. It was in the dull moments between binges that I thought I was okay but not. That's when I'd fall off **** or slam my thumb with a hammer or fall down the stairs or bang my head on **** or just twist an ankle tripping over **** and ****. I like the word **** sometimes. It's very imprecise but kind of covers it all. Sometimes I feel like **** covers everything. That's when I know I need to be more mindful cuz I'm sinking into that dull despair. That fear and loathing and sickness unto death. That ****.