"working agreement with miserable state = more insight"
There's truth in that. I just listened to a Shambhala lecture about Contentment in Everyday Life. The speaker equated contentment with satisfaction, and I have certainly been dissatisfied. This led me to ponder The Four Noble Truths and the concept of dukkha (suffering or dissatisfaction). I have changed my external circumstances, but not much. I basically have the same job as I did when I was drinking but in a different building, and it helps that it is generally a happier place, but the work is too often the same drudgery. I look forward to retiring sooner than later, but I'm holding on for financial reasons. Still, my level of dissatisfaction is considerably diminished because, I'm convinced, of my meditation and mindfulness practice. I'm averaging 20-30 minutes almost every morning, and I carry this with me. When I'm bored at work and slip into grumpy autopilot, I find my breath and connect with the present. No matter how unpleasant the present might be, it beats ruminating about regrets or creating negative stories in my head about how things could or should be. I'm not entirely happy with my circumstances, but I'm more accepting. And I'm grateful. That's all a far cry from where I was just a few months ago. Plus I can walk and pee now, but ironically I didn't have any severe health issues until a year after I got sober.