Originally Posted by
KidsEverywhere 
I know I'm getting ahead of myself here. But something that has been weighing on me. Back in 2009/2010- I went 15 months without drinking. Had a great sponsor that I considered a great friend. He said I helped him in his recovery too - we talked daily and it was a great relationship. Well, when I started drinking, I was too ashamed to face him and I just stopped calling. I think he had seen it before and he left me alone. I feel real bad about it because He truly believed in me and I let him down. When I get some sober time under my belt, I would like to reach out to him- not necessarily as a sponcor, but just to apologize for the way it ended and let him know I'm back on track. Anyone have any experience or advice around this.
He is a sponsor, not a God. He cannot keep you sober and I can say with some degree of certainty that he did not take it personally when you relapsed. I would venture to say there are absolutely no hard feelings there whatsoever. There is no reason for you to be ashamed.
Alcoholics drink. That's what we do. You had no choice in the matter and perhaps did the best you could do at that time under the circumstances. It is your alcoholism and not you that made you relapse if you are an alcoholic.
If that sponsor worked well for you in the past, it might be worth considering working with that person in the future. Say a prayer about it, have faith and God will lead you in the right direction.
Do not feel ashamed or guilty. That is our bs alcoholic mind screwing with us. If you are truly an alcoholic, don't believe any of the bs your mind is telling you right now.