Originally Posted by alybally

I belong in the friends and family forum, but I need a different perspective since I am basically hitting a wall and in so much anguish. My alcoholic ex boyfriend basically abruptly exited my life after begging me to not leave him and to continue the relationship with him. It blindsided me. One week he was begging me to stay and a week later - wham - he had a new girlfriend so he says. I was also very close to his mother for the year I was with him (off and on because of his addiction). I kept waiting for him to hit rock bottom so he could climb out of his addiction and he finally did lose his job and home, but he kept drinking. He may not be now but immediately after those two losses he kept going. He became like a stranger, a monster and started being really ugly and mean and threatened to embarrass me and try to make me lose my job. This is a man who told me I would never know how deeply he loved me and who kept pushing me away to supposedly "protect" me when he was spiraling downwards.

He basically cut me out of his life, then threatened me, I had to send him a cease and desist letter to protect my employment, and then his mother cut contact with me even though he was the one who was doing everything wrong.

My question is, why do alcoholics do this to people they say they love? I'm taking it so personally and I'm in so much pain. I can't seem to get back on track or keep it together. I lost my drivers license this week (can't find it that is), I'm hardly functioning at work and I just missed my flight to a conference. I've never missed a flight. I'm falling apart and I don't know how to climb out of the whole and I'm scared I will never be the same again. I feel damaged and like I've lost my innocence. The pain and betrayal are all consuming.