Charliesworld I relate, I drank and drank for years, all night, so ill the next day I would drink again to try and 'get rid of that feeling' I never really thought it was too much of a problem you know - I was the original party girl! So I thought! Back then I was also a young single mum - I cringe with horror at what my darling daughter - now 17 saw. Then when I married and had more kids I of course tried to curb it a bit but still drank most nights, often starting at lunch time blaming business lunches, my poor husband and kids. It was getting a strain.Then I had a really serious illness a few years back (not drink related funnily)and discovered opiates and benzos and that was it, no one could really tell I was high, I could function, I could get through my work week, I was the typical functioning addict! Then I started to get ill, accidental OD's, months and months off work, lost my job, multiple A&E (ER) and hospital admissions (not good as husband Consultant at our city hospital so he was beyond mortified) Then the alcohol crept back in and was downhill from there. I totally get what you mean about being in house alone at night, if my H is on call and im home alone its so tempting, My poor teenager - shes always home and that gives me that peace of mind that I know she'll watch the little ones iv had since my marriage .... so wrong on so many levels. Rehab is the best place for me this time, iv tried it on my own 5 or 6 times now, cant even remember. But I get you so much - the insomnia is a killer I don't know how the hell il cope with work when I get home end of next week ... Anyway sounds like youv had a productive morning - cleaning and ironing is therapeutic! We'l both be tired later - but hey we r sober!!! and its always nice to see someone else from the UK!