Originally Posted by
NYCDoglvr 
No, I'm sure if you look back it was there before the relationship. But perfectionism is common among codependents. That's why taking the first step -- "I am powerless over people, places and things" -- can be so difficult.
I actually think, given A's ability to make others feel that their lying and craziness is all someone else's fault, that that sort of behavior matched my desire to be perfect and never upset anyone else...
My xAH would have had FAR less success with blaming someone who didn't have an unhealthy need to please and appease others...
A match made in hell I guess...