I would NEVER move in with someone because they had money! If I wanted someone with money I wouldn't be with an alcoholic, I'd be with one of the landed men I met at University. I say 'we' because that's how we phrase it as being 'our' home. I know it will be his name on the title, but as a process, WE chose it with the aim of living there together and building a life for ourselves. Whether that life turns out to be possible is another matter, hence planning also for the worst. But we want to try for the time being.
I honestly don't think I am telling 'rational lies' to myself or anyone else. I had set myself the deadline of being out of there and away from such an awful, threatening landlord/lady by Christmas. I am also fully aware that things would not have come to such a head so soon if he hadn't drank and confronted them. I am absolutely aware that my relationship with him may not be able to be a permanent one. I posted because I felt stressed about having go move so quickly, upset about all the reasons that had come together outside of my control and angry, very angry with my landlady. I expected to be told 'leave him then'. But I didn't expect or invite suggestions that I am with him for his money or that I am making up lies to.myself or anyone else!
If it was about greed, or not being able to let go of the payday, I would be taking my landlady to court for both my deposit and the money for my car. I have instead written them both off in the pursuit of just getting away from her.
I wasn't expecting applause for being with an alcoholic, but as most of us are in a similar position I did hope for a little shared experience and feeling less alone dealing with this. Thank you to those who did that. I do appreciate your posts. However, I think I will stop reading this thread now. I don't need the extra stress.