"But what sucks worse is waking up day after day to realise that not only does the addict not love you, you don't love yourself anymore either."
This really struck a cord with me, its one of the few times I was able to cry. l don't think I can move forward without thinking he loved me. Because our relationship wasn't one sided. He paid for dinners/ outings and he was emotionally available for me. He had to essentially come out to everyone when he asked me to be his boyfriend and was very boisterous about it.
But then the doubts creep in and I think "what if he never loved you, why else would he be so quick to turn on me during this program"
I just wish he would talk to me so I could get some answers. It would be easier if he just said "I don't love you" I would be able to walk away.
Tonight has been rough because its been a week since I last heard from him.
Thank you for the replies and for the love and support. These forums really keep me feeling better about things.