Shooting star! I love you! Have I ever told you that?
You know what's funny? I actually was leaving the whole dating website thing alone and it wasn't bothering me for a long time. You know when it started bothering me? When I brought it up to friends, and they got all ticked about it and called it disrespectful and pointed out all the things he may (or may not) be doing online, etc. It got into my head and I found myself obsessing about it.
If I don't bring it up to my friends, the whole thing is like a fleeting thought to me. I completely agree with what you are saying. I jumped into a relationship, totally against my better judgement, but here I am and I have found a relatively normal man who I really like and am attracted to and who apparently feels the same about me. There's no reason for me to put pressure on him because, really, I'm not sure where I AM AT YET. I am obviously still recovering from my divorce and my past hurts. Thank God I am working my program and have a great sponsor who tells me exactly what you have said here. I am not about to end this relationship just because of my insecurities and codependent thought patterns, not yet anyway because I want to be fair to him and because I am not feeling like it's run it's course. I plan on just taking it slow and letting it fold organically. No pressure. Now, if I could just learn to sit and enjoy living 'just for today', I'd be happy, right, LOL?
Oh, and a quick followup: he told me, back when we were about 8 weeks into our dating, that when women send him a request on the website he tells them 'no thank you' and that he is seeing someone and that he appreciates their interest. And, at the time, I was doing the same but my account expired earlier than his and I chose to not renew.