It's weird. On my last stint which lasted about nine months, I was so boldfaced. I didn't care. I never bothered to get something else. I figured there was no way to hide it when I was buying at 7 in the morning. I sort of adopted a go-ahead-and-challenge me attitude. Was I embarrassed? of course. But I like anger take over. I wanted that stuff and I wanted it soon, especially toward the end when I began shaking and really needed to get it down. Geez. After one sip in the lot, I was "fine" again.
I also did risky things in terms of integrity. I'm wondering if people know. Thankfully, I only did this twice, but I helped myself to a few sips at friends' home bars. Ugh. Imagine if they would have walked in. I was so blasted, who knows if they were passing by. On most occasions, I would bring some with me like all the other people here. I can't count how many half pints and pints I threw out in gas stations, restaurants, and bowling alleys in the pad dispenser. I'm sure the cleaning personnel see a lot of this.