Such a fascinating thread. I had my preferred bar here in my little village, where everyone goes and everyone drinks quite a bit. But I started to get very embarrassed about the number of glasses of wine I was ordering so I'd sometimes leave and go to another gas station that also had a little bar. It is scruffy and disgusting and I hate it, but at least I could stop in and say "ah, just a long day, thought I'd treat myself to a glass of wine" only I was 5 or 6 deep at that point. I would also go to my preferred bar, have a couple and then get a bottle to go. I would speak to the bartender and tell them I was going to a dinner and they were serving light fish/grilled steak/salmon/spicy vegetarian, what would you recommend? I don't know how it is in other countries, but in Italy, anytime you purchase a gift they will elaborately wrap it for you free of charge. So I would say "oh, I'm off to a dinner party, could you wrap this a gift?" and they would go through the whole process of wrapping the bottle in custom paper, getting out a beautiful wine bag, putting a nice embossed sticker on the bag to close it, an elaborate bow and maybe some flowers to dress it up. An entire, annoying, nerve wracking 5 minute process and also a total waste of resources as I would just drive straight home, hating myself for spending way more than I wanted for my ruse (let's face it, the cheapest bottle would have done), and unwrap the "gift" myself and go at it. I'd then hide all the paper and bows and bags so if my boyfriend came over he wouldn't' ask what it was all about.
I also, and this is something I am deeply ashamed of, but feel I need to own up to as I begin to think about my step 4 of AA, began to lie to the bar about my consumption. At most of the local bars in my area, especially where they know you, they just serve you what you want and then when you are done you go and say "I need to pay for 4 glasses of wine" or whatever you had. I have always, always been fiercely honest. My integrity as a person has been extremely important to me. But I got to the point where I was so embarrassed that I would knock off a glass or two of my total when I went to pay. Not because I didn't want to pay, or couldn't' pay, but because I was too ashamed to admit how much I had consumed. Actually, I don't know what to do about that, I am suffering from extreme guilt at the thought of stealing. It doesn't' add up to much, but even €3 is too much, I hate that I have done that.