I find that I have very little interest in school these days. It is hard to fit it in to my schedule anymore. I thought this class would be more interesting--and maybe it would have been a year ago--but right now I'm finding it irritating, like a fly buzzing around my head. Those old Hebrew classes are looking pretty good in comparison!
I wish I could quit, but I feel that that would be the wrong thing to do. I think it would be better to see the degree through to completion, even though I could not possibly care less whether I get it or not. I do better in managing life when my mind is occupied.
When I was struggling with Hebrew, I was going through the tough time with my dad and I thought, "If I can just push through this, courses will get better later on."
This one isn't getting better.
It is great to look back on the Hebrew challenge, knowing I pulled things out against all odds. But now that routine is getting old. How many times can you fake yourself out without losing interest in the drama?
I will just look forward to four weeks from now, when I write another paper. I honestly do love the research and creativity of writing papers. I even love documenting every reference. In fact, I especially love that: scoping out as many resources as I can find, and then picking really cool things and weaving them all together to form a compelling paper.
I guess that's the solution, just as it always is--I'll just put up with the stuff that is bogging me down and live for the paper!