Hey Beanskillet!
Not sure I qualify to answer your question as it's early days for me (I'm approaching 4 months sober). After 25 years drinking I also managed a 6 week sober spell last year but relapsed.
In retrospect, I think that last time round I just wasn't ready to call it a day. Although I would never admit it, I couldn't then envisage a life in which I'd never drink again. I think I can now. I think this is the same as a lot of things. If you really, really want it more than anything then you can have it. But you need to want it more than anything else. When I was a kid I really, really wanted to play electric guitar to a top level so I practised for hours every day and I became a guitar player. My son says he really wants to play guitar but he doesn't practise...so he can't play.
What I mean is that there's a difference between wanting to want something badly enough and really wanting something so bad you'd give practically anything to achieve it.
I'm not sure if this will make any sense to anyone apart from myself but man, I want this sober life to work for me so badly. I have so much to lose and everything to gain if I can only keep myself in check.
I know anyone can relapse any time, anywhere but I also feel that even if you do it's how you deal with it that counts.
Anyway, hope that makes a little sense
