Thank you everyone, after my conversation with ex a I did feel good!
Feelinggreat yes I do think she will try to wriggle out of it she won't want to live with her dad and she may think that it will all be forgotten about and we can go back to how it was. I don't want her to move out but I won't live in my own home feeling anxious and scared to say anything, I won't go back to that, that was how I lived with ex a!! If she does decide she doesn't want to live with her dad there will have to be big changes and should she slip back to her old ways she will have to go and I will lay this out straight to her!!
I do think she needs to live on her own to see the reality of life and I do think our relationship will improve once she hasn't been living at home for a while.
Yes I think he will be panicking he doesn't want to have to deal with any responsibilities. He told me yesterday that she can stay with him for a while while she figures out what she wants to do!! Although he will like the extra money she will give him but he will not want her there interfering in his life!!