I can really relate to your story, Upwards. I always seem to crack at one month too, and similarly, it's any heightened emotion - often anxiety - that has me reaching for the bottle. I would give you advice but that would be a little bit like the blind leading the blind. It does sound like you expect a lot of yourself. Other people in this class have spoken about that too. I think it's partly our culture...you know, achieve, achieve, achieve. Be a 'success'. Whatever that means. I reckon success for us is giving up drinking. Even if that's all we did with the rest of our lives, it would be an enormous accomplishment. So yeah, just chill the f*^k out, okay?!
Love xxxx