Reading through quickly, but totally identifying with your feelings, Arbor. This has been a long, hard fight for me, with a heavy drinking, but really nice guy, for a partner. We just hBe to decide what is best for us. Are we happy drinking to excess? Can we drink moderately? That means no more than one drink a day for a woman. I know that is not what I want, if I choose to drink. One is just aggravating. I always want more. But more is, at the very least, unhealthy, and to the extreme, deadly.