Just caught up on posts :-)
I used to 'reward' myself after a day in the garden with a few bevvies too, or go mental cleaning, mowing, gardening, getting all sorts of stuff done that had got on top of us while I was half cut. Pretty dangerous, and have a few scars to prove it.
Bob - I called you 'sourgrapes' by mistake yesterday. What a doofus! Laughed at your 'searching for crazy drunken posts' anecdote. Don't know how often I've frantically tried to piece together conversations I apparently had while drunk from snippets I've got later.
Toki - those random "I can have a drink" thoughts scare me too. It's weird feeling at war with yourself. I hadn't heard people talk about the 'AV" (alcohol voice?) before coming on SR. It's handy to externalise that voice as 'something other' than me. Maybe that increases our sense of power and helps us dissociate from it. Here's hoping.
Hugs to everyone
