AF, I don't think anyone here can or should "diagnose" another person as being an alcoholic or not. Some would say that if we need to ask the question then we likely are. If you can moderate, then more power to you. In my case, if I thought I could moderate (and yes, I've been there!), knowing what I know now, I would say that if I needed to think about it then that alone would be a red flag.
When you ask a bunch of alcoholics for advice about moderation, it's probably a bit like going to a hardware store to buy bread :-)