Originally Posted by
Weasel1966 
Thanks for the comments. I do appreciate the feedback.
Jerryfish.... It's not that easy. Oh of course we can all just stop doing whatever it is that cause us to self harm. Sure we could. But the fact is there are patterns to break. Learning and relearning to do.
The difference between this voice and the AV. The reason they cannot be the same is that AV is a voice of action. It tells me or tries to tell me to drink or drug. This other voice is part of a deep belief system I have about myself through repeated abuse from others. Children don't grow up thinking they are worthless unless they are made to feel and accept, sadly, at some point that they are. I did just that.
I can tell AV to go eff himself yes. I don't believe that is part of me.
I cannot tell this other voice to go eff itself. I believe it's message. I need to change that belief.
A slight of hand it may seem but they are distinctly different.
I will prevail. As long as I see it I have no other choice but to conquer it. It's an intense training exercise.
Well I can tell you that the people who were responsible for the abuse were dead wrong. But that won't fix it, maybe loosen it up (I hope).
This sounds perfect for Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. Or some other form of therapy that can help you transform these feelings into positive ones. Personally, I'd see a doctor about it. Actually, I have.
In the past I've had therapy and it really helped a lot.