I think it's a good idea to reflect on how bad it actually got. Since my last slip I've been doing that a lot. I was never a morning drinker or a drinker at work which is why I had a hard time admitting my alcoholism, but as soon as I got home it was game on to see how much alcohol I could get in to my stomach before dinner. DAILY. The weekends were a mess. Usually would start drinking by 12 noon-1 o'clock. Could easily finish one of those big bottles of wine in an afternoon. And who knows what else. All the empties hidden upstairs in my studio. Boy what a mess! Looking back it's pretty classic textbook alcoholism.