Hey everyone! I'm back from work, from an AA meeting, from getting kids into bed. What a day. So very little time to relax by myself before crawling into bed. But there's people to say hello to. To support. Ice cream to be eaten.
LA, I just want to give you a hug and tell you not to beat yourself up. Use it as a learning experience. I'm with BigS here. Take a step back from the distractions. For so very, very long I looked to other things and other people and other situations to fix what was broken inside. To bandage the wounds. To fill the holes in my soul. The answer is in me. Other people aren't a patch though they can help get us through it. Hang in there and I'm so very glad you are on the bus. Hugs.
My AA meeting was actually quite good. The format of this particular meeting is "the ask it basket." People write out a question and put it in and then you draw a question, read it aloud and answer it. Now this meeting in particular tonight had a lot of people. Three quarters of whom came on a bus from a half way house. Half way from prison, jail or rehab. A lot of court slips were signed. The questions read like threads on the newcomers forum. "Will I always be obsessed with alcohol?" "Why am I advised not to get into a relationship in the first year of sobriety" and yes, that was an actual question tonight. One question "why is it easier for me to stay sober when I'm supervised like in prison or in rehab and when I'm alone, I relapse?" People were so new but I liked it. It made me think. And BECAUSE I stick around here on SR and read and think and post, I was able to share my own experience with other people. Just honestly wish Mr. Ruby would get it. He just walked in from his quick trip to buy "cigarettes " after hitting me up this morning for ten dollars to buy bait for his fishing this morning. He's broke. Ten dollars can't buy both cigarettes and bait. Sigh.
So. I'm grateful for my sobriety. Im grateful I have you all. I'm grateful period.