Art I've been doing that for the last 4 months. Only drinking on the weekends (a few weekdays too cuz I can't actually control it). But there is no moderation involved at all.... I'm not even pretending to moderate.
I'm afraid of letting go of my crutch. Of being bare of it. Of what my new life will look like. Of being my authentic self. Of all those situations I will find myself in. The list goes on and on.
But I'm also scared of continuing down the path I'm on..... it's the wrong path for me. I'm damaging myself and my family and I'm not being true to myself.
I'm afraid of failing too. Big time.
But fear won't kill me. Drinking might..... or at least bring me an early death.