Glad you are back Silly.
I have gone through some life changing things in the past 2 years.
I have also been through some serious health issues too.
Sometimes I feel like I have very little left.
I feel like someone has whipped my security blanket from me and I won't ever get it back.
However...........through out of it, I have not drank.
Sometimes I think its because if I do have a drink, I won't be able to stop.
Other times I know, from experience, it does not make things any better or easier to cope with.
Sometimes I say to myself, if things feel this bad still by tomorrow, I will have a drink if I want one, but I won't drink today.
Then I try to distract myself on keep busy.
I can hand on heart say that there has never been a tomorrow where I have felt so bad still that I have had a drink.
Drink or no drink, I will still remain lonely, unemployed and feeling depressed.
I also personally believe that when I look over some of the rubbish times I have had, I should be proud of myself.
Partner left - did not drink.
Made redundant - did not drink.
Having housing issues - have not drunk.
Feeling proud of not drinking makes me see myself in a bit of a better life.
People will say, wow you have dealt with a lot, and I think to myself, yes I have and I did it without resorting to numbing myself with booze.
Its nice feeling proud of yourself.
It makes me feel that whatever life throws at me, I can cope, however unpleasant it is at the time.
I wish you the best xx