You have the power to change stop this fear.
Do you want to stop drinking for good?
I know others that have done the big session/binge, then swear off drink for 2 weeks to prove they don't have a problem, then go back to drinking because they have done their time!!
I sort of understand that, but to me it just sounds like torture.
When I realised that drink in any amount just made me unhappy, it was almost a relief to stop.
There was no more self monitoring.
No more setting rules about how much I could drink a night, then getting cross when I exceeded it.
No more ridiculous self enforced rules - like only drinking thursday - sunday or no spirits mid week or 2 glasses of wine a night and no more.
Honestly for me stopping full stop was best the way forward.
I wish you the best and hope you stick around here.