What do you all think of this
My AH didn't rage, throw things, break things, pee the bed or ever act in a mean way to the kids. His abuse was in his absence, mostly. Or that he was dismissive/belittling toward me.
If he ever was home (or if we were on vacation) he'd spend time exclusively with the kids (doing whatever- watching sports, playing whiffle ball) and pointedly ignore me. This is tough because it's very isolating.
Most of his hurt to the kids is abandonment, which I feel terrible about. Every time it happened, he'd promise never again but that would only last till the next drinking binge. Then he runs.
I have the kids in alateen and counseling. Still, I struggle with forgiving myself for putting them through that.
Please, can you all advise and give thoughts: am I making too much of it? He will never admit to hurting us or apologize to the kids. He thinks he's been a great father.
We've tried to move on/get healthy without him. He is currently sober but still very cold as a person and not there for any of us.
Sometimes it seems like NPD or Anti-social Personality disorder.