Old 06-10-2015, 11:51 AM
  # 21 (permalink)  
SadInTX
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Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Texas
Posts: 251
I too went through a "divorce" (we were never married but had two kids together) with a man that is a narcissist , antisocial and has Borderline Personality Disorder and and it was very frustrating. I was the one with the steady job, had health insurance for my kids, the house mortgage was in my name, all utilities were in my name because he had horrible credit - he was alcoholic and compulsive gambler. But when it came to mediating our custody/child support agreement for $450 for two kids (he didn't have a steady job at that time) , he actually turned to me and said, "you should be thanking me - I am being a nice guy here." What a joke! I want to yell, scream and just let him have it after all he put me through, but I didn't. I didn't say a word.
I did a lot of research regarding narcissists and divorce...Here is something I found that helped..."If you are divorcing a narcissist, you need to be prepared that your spouse will put on the greatest show of their lives -- divorce is the ultimate opportunity to showcase their role as the victim/martyr. At last, they get to prove to the world why you are a horrible, unworthy person and/or parent. The worst thing you can do, states divorce attorney Robert Farzad*, is to react emotionally to any of it.
"All of your emotions and what you feel are irrelevant. The minute you react to that person, you are already losing the battle," Farzad said. "Stop feeling and start thinking."
Divorce is their last ditch effort to try and control you...try to make themselves look like the better person...I was so happy to get it over with...just let your lawyer do his/her job...let him or her do the thinking for you...if he tries to talk to you, text you, email, just tell him to send it to your lawyer...so sorry you had to go through this..but it does get better...hoping it goes okay today
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